Heinz gets FANCY

So the folks at Heinz ketchup (yes, I said ketchup, not catsup you weirdo) are getting fancy with their sauce. Their ordinary ketchup contains vinegar, but they've decided to up the ante and switch the normal stuff over to balsamic. You can order your promo bottle here for a reasonable price, and for today only orders will ship free and come with one free bottle!

My order went through just fine, and I cannot WAIT to try the stuff. I'm thinking on hand-cut french fries that we fry in our own deep fryer. Let's see if I can get Tim working on that.

I want to go to there.

So check out this amazing article about a boutique shop opening up in New York featuring (drum roll please) only mayonnaise. ONLY MAYONNAISE I said!

I do think the article has one misnomer - mayonnaise is already my "big thing," no next about it.

While I do love the stuff, at our house we have a tendency to stick with the lighter versions (check out the Kraft Olive Oil version w/ Cracked Pepper). Super good, and not too bad on calories.

What do you love to put mayo on? I'm a sucker for sandwiches, and of course tuna/chicken salads, but am I missing out on slathering it somewhere else?

Condiment Crackdown: Cooking Channel Fans Like Their Hot Sauce

Condiment Crackdown: Cooking Channel Fans Like Their Hot Sauce

Oi! There are other condiment whores out there too! I must admit, I am on a total Sriracha kick, and have a tendency to stick it in runner up Mayo. I am, however, surprised by the nod to ketchup - really? I rarely use ketchup on its own, but I will often mix it with tabasco. We also recently re-purchased some curry ketchup from Dunderbak's. I really enjoy it in place of ketchup, although certain versions can be a bit sweet. It's great on tater tots and fries though. I might be interested in using it on a lamb burger with some roasted veggies and perhaps cilantro (just a nod to some Indian spices).

Are there any condiments you use on a regular basis that didn't make it on the list? I would probably add soy sauce, sesame oil, chili oil, and vinegar (mostly white and rice).

Japanese Kewpie?

I saw this article on Banh Mi (you say it "Bun Me" just like Pho is "Fuh") and they talk about Japanese Kewpie mayo. I actually saw Kewpie at world market a few weekends ago and was curios - mostly because of the cute baby on the bottle. Has anyone tried it?

You can buy the cute stuff by clicking the photo. Oh - and how about the Banh Mi for you? I think we may have our next sandwich in the making!

-Leanne

Condiment Write-Off?

Yes, you read that correctly. Write-Off, not Write-Up.

Check out this post from a savvy tax lawyer which discusses whether or not the condiments Tim and I buy to try for the blog are tax-deductible!! Well, actually it just discusses this generally, but it's more fun if we think I actually asked the question.

Essentially the answer is no (boo-hiss), mostly because Tim and I don't make money off this blog (we do it for the love of the condiments MAN. not the money!), and even if we did, we would only be able to write off that portion of the condiment we used for blog-related purposes; any items left over for household use would not be deductible.

Can you really imagine that? Ok, let's see, I tested 1/12 of this bottle of ketchup, so I can write off 1/12 of the $3.69 I paid for it. Um. Yeah. No. As much as I'd love to make this blog and condiment taste-testing my full time career, my guess is that this is just a pipe dream.

There's still great ways to use all the extra condiments you're storing, however. Check out Greg's awesome ideas for "mining out" your fridge and putting those good leftovers to use. I especially dig his Frank's reference, because we all know its one of our faves!

Best Condiment List!

Check out this article for a list of some of the best condiments in the world!

There's several that I've had on there, and completely agree with. I don't know how I'd like without mayo (regardless of whether it's full fat or one of the several light versions) or Sriracha (and they're even better when put together - maybe we'll get Tim to list his full recipe). I also really love currywurst, although right now my fridge is stocked with a mild version, and I'd like to see if there's a spicy one available. Can't find currywurst near you? I pick mine up at a local German pub - Mr. Dunderbak's. Dunderbak's is a chain, so they may have one near you, but also try places like Cost Plus World Market - they carry it as well.

Cholula truly makes my top 5 list, and is fantastic (hot sauce that has a great taste). I also think fish sauce (and fresh ginger) makes most asian food taste better - a little will go a long way and make your food really pop!

I also completely agree that Heinz makes the best ketchup (YES KETCHUP NOT CATSUP) and won't stock anything else in the fridge (except the currywurst).

I do disagree with a few on there. I've never been able to stomach vegemite for example (sorry my South African friends) and while I think tahini has good uses (hummus, babaganoush), I'm not a fan of it on its own.

So what are your top 5 list? I'm sure mine varies from day to day, but right now I'll go with:
Frank's Hot Sauce
Cholula
Horseradish Mustard
Mayo
Peanut Sauce

A little V-day and Condiment connection!

So I know this is a little late, since Valentines Day (AND MY BDAY - HINT HINT) has since come and gone, but this is a pretty cute article about hot sauce and love that I thought everyone would enjoy:

Hot Sauce a Love - is there a Connection?

So what do you think? Does that delicious spicy hotness you get from Cholula or Franks hit you the same was as your significant other might? (No, I am not condoning hitting anyone). And what about those kids? Think their tastebuds are still in development, or do they have it right?

I believe that the rush I get from Tim is a lot like that delicious fire I feel from hot sauce, albeit Tim's rush is longer lasting. It's not like I can freebase hot sauce all day long to maintain that high. And those kids - well, I'm not sure if they have it right, but they're just so darn cute!

Niiiiice Package

It seems that this is how they do condiment packets in Australia. I feel like Dave is holding out on me. How sweet is that design?

CELEBRITY CONDIMENT SEX SCANDLE!

I have a guilty pleasure beyond the world of condiments. Rumors and gossip. I think I'm not alone in the thrill of learning what goes on behind closed doors. When the rumor centers on the eccentricities of the rich and the famous what could be better? I'll tell you what could better - pairing a celebrity’s kink with bizarre condiment usage.

This one involves an unnamed actor of TV and movies who is not a lead but is often cast as a love interest to the leading lady. Another clue to the identity of subject of this rumor is that this fellah has a famous girl friend. Rumor going around is that the actor has been cheating on his significant other. Same old, same old right? Not so fast. It would seem that our intrepid thespian is never without his backpack containing a jar of mayonnaise. He requires that his partners slather him with the condiment. One can assume that there is something about the stable emulsion of egg and oil that gets him hot.

Source

Heinz Going to Play Hide the Pickle

Reuters reports that Heinz is taking the pickle out of their logo.

So what are they going to find to replace the pickle on their ketchup products?  Oh what in god's name can replace such a natural marrage of pickle and ketchup? Oh right...a tomato! Whew! Look for Heinz to pull its pickle sometime this year. 

Creator of Sabrett's Prepared Onions Dies

Alan Geisler, the creator of the red-onion sauce many New Yorkers love on their hot dogs, has died. He was 78 years old. 

Unfortunately it seems being born in the Mid-West has somehow kept me unaware of Mr. Geisler's creation. In searching out some info regarding what a red-onion sauce I've found that its a patented mix of onions, tomato paste and olive oil and that its sold as Sabrett's Prepared Onions. 

While the New York Post's states the recipe is patented I was able to search out what someone considers a reasonable recreation of the sauce. From YAHOO! Answers: 

1 1/2 teaspoons olive oil 

1 medium onion, sliced thin and chopped 

4 cups water 

2 tablespoons tomato paste 

2 teaspoons corn syrup 

1 teaspoon cornstarch 

1/2 teaspoon salt 

1/4 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes 

1/4 cup vinegar 

1. Heat the oil in a large saucepan over medium heat. 

2. Sauté sliced onion in the oil for 5 minutes, until onions are 

soft but not brown. 

3. Add water, tomato paste, corn syrup, cornstarch, salt, and red 

pepper flakes, and stir. 

4. Bring mixture to a boil, then reduce heat and simmer for 45 

minutes. Add vinegar. Continue to simmer for an additional 30 to 45 

minutes or until most of the liquid has reduced and the sauce is 

thick. 

Makes about 1 cup. 

The author also suggests doubling the recipe due to the time it takes to create the sauce. I'd say to double it cause it sounds great and I can't imagine that one cup would be enough. 

Thanks Mr. Geisler for your contributions to the world of condiments! 

Readers' Poll!

Consider this our first ever Readers' Poll (do we even have any readers?):

Are spices a condiment?

I'm going for a big 'CERTAINLY!' primarily because I would like to include them within the gaggle of things about which we blog. I would also like to point out that dictionary.com (which is citable as a reference, and has been quoted in legal opinions) defines condiment as:

something used to give a special flavor to food, as mustard, ketchup, salt, or spices (Random House, 2006); or

a substance, such as a relish, vinegar, or spice, used to flavor or complement food (The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition, 2006); or

something used to give relish to food, and to gratify the taste; a pungment (sic) and appetizing substance, as pepper or mustard; seasoning (Webster's Revised Unabridged Dictionary, 1996).

So if you'll notice, all of the above clearly include spices within the definition of condiment. Alas, I'll leave the ultimate decision to our readers (who will do me the honor of commenting pretty please!).

Santa Baby

Do you remember the best toy you ever got for Xmas, birthday, or maybe granny's-gettin'-outta-prison day? You can throw out your Hello My Little He-Joe (with kung-fu grip). There's a new most awesome toy in town. Ladies and Gentlemen, allow me to present The Condiment Gun...

For an extremely reasonable $29. 95 you get the gun and two cartridges capable of holding 3.4 oz of sauce each. Check out this snippet of the seller's, firebox.com, description;

"All you do is load up the Condiment Gun's cartridge (two supplied) with your favorite sauce, bung it in and squeeze the trigger."

Come on you all know you've always wanted to bung something much less firing off some Sriracha out of a gun looks like something Roger Rabbit might holster.

Currently this outstanding piece of human engeneering is out of stock but firebox.com is taking orders for when they get some more. Question is, do you need it?

That's what I thought....

What's On Second

As soon as I get some pix of off my camera and format some blogs here are some of the topics we'll be covering...

• Habanero Jelly - I was gifted a jar of homemade golden yummy from Julie. The plan is to post the recipe that she used but to also give a list of all the different ways I will consume the spicy sweet contents.
• The Miracle Fruit Tasting(s) - I've now had the miracle fruit pill experience two separate occasions and have much to report. With any luck there will be some feed back from a group of friends that had miracle fruit gathering as well.
• Horseradish Mustard Blind Taste Test - At a weekend getaway with friends, we had three different horseradish mustards and had people taste and rate them. I believe fun was had by all. I want to follow it up with additional blind tastings but I'm having a hard time coming up with a good name for the 'segment'. Any suggestions?

Whip that Olive!

Are you a fan of Top Chef? I am, especially after they declared their love for mayonnaise in multiple challenges (the first one of my memory was in Season 2, Episode 10 where hottie Sam Talbot - now executive chef of the Surf Lodge - declared his love for Mayo in a quickfire - YUM! - check out the scene here, and of course, when they make the chefs whip up the good stuff during the relay quick fires).

In any case, my love for mayo, unlike my love for Top Chef, comes with a nasty caloric drawback - a serving size of regular mayo has 100 calories - all of which come from fat - and 11 fat grams - YIKES! But never fear, Kraft Foods have whipped out a tasty alternative made from olive oil, which only has 45 calories (35 from fat), and 4 grams of fat, per serving. It's even being recommended by my favorite healthy-food guru Hungry Girl.

My review of the stuff - can't tell the difference between it and regular mayo - which is far superior to the other alternatives like Miracle Whip and SmartBeat. What's even better is that it comes in an upside down squeeze bottle, wherein all the mayo magically floats down to the bottom as you use it - that's right - NO MAYO WASTAGE! The stats of the olive oil mayo are the same as Kraft's lite mayo, but I think the olive oil stuff tastes better - uh-oh, I feel a taste test coming up!

Needless to say, I'm in love with the stuff - then again, I'm a Mayo kind of gal - Miracle Whip is fine, but I prefer the good stuff. My main question is that most DIY mayo recipes caution against using all Olive Oil - Kraft's version has olive oil, soybean oil, and canola oil - but no clue as to what the recommended ratios are.

You Got your Banana in my Sauce! You Got your Sauce on my Banana!

There's an Asian food market that I like to wander around semi-aimlessly. Usually when I go there I'll pick up some variety of frozen buns to steam later. Their fresh veggie section is a little questionable though. Despite that I have to check the produce out because they hang a durian poster that always lures me in with the promise that one day I will try what will most likely be a terribly wretched fruit. Fun! The store is also a treasure trove of exotic condiments that are new and exciting to this culturally stunted Mid-Western farm boy. It is here that I came upon an item called simply Banana Sauce.

A product of the Philippines made by the Jufran company, the sauce is red in color and is housed in a familiar ketchup like bottle. The store I bought it from had two styles: one regular and one labeled hot. Surprise, surprise… I went with the spicier of the two.

Getting the bottle home I did some quick research to find that it is also called banana ketchup and that it is relatively recent product, originally created in the mid 1940's. It was created as a ketchup substitute in response to U.S. G.I.'s being stationed in the Philippines (where there must have been some shortage of tomatoes). It was adopted into a seemingly odd mix of dishes; a topping for fried chicken, mixed with mayo and used as a salad dressing, and as a pasta sauce. I have to tell you about this pasta dish (whoever entered the info on the wiki page calls it a spaghetti dish but I'm not 100% sure if spaghetti is being used generically or specifically. Lets assume for a moment that it is being specific to the spaghetti pasta). So, you have your banana sauce standing in for a marinara then you top with grated cheddar cheese and hot dogs, Vienna sausages, or corned beef. Huh... First time I read that I was puzzled but now that I've had some time to think about it, I might just give it a shot.

Having a taste of the Jufran sauce I found it to be mildly sweet with a hint of heat behind it. It doesn't have a banana taste to it at all. I was afraid to get smacked aside the head with a Laffy Taffy fake banana flavor but I can report that was not the case. That said, what is up with the consistency? It expelles itself out of the bottle with plopping sound that one associates with a semi-congealed swamp creature. Seriously. Does this somehow make me shallow to factor the consistency (and the fascinating sounds effect that goes along with it) into my review? The lumps of this faux-ketcup really didn't bother me too much but the child inside of me wanted to poke it with a stick to make sure it wasn't still alive.

Well what to do with this stuff? After some further looking around the web for what to use the sauce for, I went and purchased some tilapia and a lime. I marinated the fish in the sauce and some lime then tossed each side under the broiler for a few minutes. I give my hastly cooking two and a half 'meh' out of five. Maybe it wasn't the best way to initially explore the subtle nature of the banana sauce. I will be heading back to the kitchen to experiment again.

So far I have nothing negative to say about initial foray into a world where a red banana sauce lives. I think it has one of those flavor profiles that, when you find just the right pairing, it becomes craving. I'll keep working in the Drizzle and Schmear labs to see what I can come up with.

PA-DAAAAAANG

Here's a quick tip for flavor boosting your next order of pork fried rice.


Step One: Buy a bottle of House of Tsang Bangkok Padang Peanut Sauce.
Step Two: Pour on top of pork 'n rice.
Step Three: Consume serving of amped-up takeout standard. Repeat as necessary.

Full props go out to Alie for giving me the heads up on this tasty treat. Atta girl!

Other things Bangkok Padang Peanut Sauce is good for? Off the top off of my head is that I've found it to be excellent on kabobs. Oh and its also great as a makeshift battle cry... BANGKOK PADANG!!!

New Contributor!

Exciting news for us here at the D'izzle, David from shittysalad.com is going to dropping the s'up from his unique perspective. I'm really looking forward to seeing what he's going to lay on us. In the mean time check out shittysalad.com and celebrate that there is someone who is championing the anti-iceberg lettuce movement.

Miracle Fruit?

Has anyone else heard of this Miracle Fruit stuff (aka Miracle Berry, Magic Berry, or Flavor Berry)? I could explain it but lets have Graham Norton have a go...

Well OK, not so informative but somewhat entertaining. Here's a vid from New York.

Whoa, right? The wiki page for it does seem to support the claims. Guess I better look online for a distributor. When I get some I'll post the whole process and the after effects.

This Blog is Under Construction that’s why they Call it an Under Construction Blog.

This is a declaration.

This blog is not dead but it has been struggling. A stutter-step dance of format and content has recently left us in a state of standing still. Good news is that is changing shortly. Within the next couple of weeks (after a trip to San Fran) expect to see a change in the blog’s look and frequency of updates.

My excitement towards this blog hasn’t diminished. I hope to see you soon with a new start here at Drizzle and Schmear.

~tim